Thursday, August 28, 2008

If I were President!

So I was laying in bed last night watching television, and due to having the “basic” cable package there were not many channels to surf. The Democratic National Convention was being broadcast on all of the local stations - so out of sheer boredom I watched for a bit. I chuckled to myself at how ridiculous this whole election year has been - but also a bit pissed because this garbage was being shown in place of quality TV programming - like Jerry Springer, one of my personal favorites. It got me to thinking what things I would change if I were President!
Do you ever wonder what you would do if you were President? Would you try and raise taxes? Lower Taxes? Truthfully, if you were to ask me right now, I would say I do not know.
So what do I know? If I was as smart as the people running the country, or soon to be, I’d be running the country. So I must not be that smart…….or, am I? Are you? You might be thinking - Jason, the average citizen isn’t qualified to lead the country. REALLY? Can the average citizen balance their checkbook? Most do. Would the average citizen pay $640.00 for a toilet seat? I think not.
Does the average citizen think we need leaders who would spend the average citizen’s money responsibly, someone like, oh I don’t know….let’s say, an average citizen? (I just like saying average citizen).
If you do, then support my plan! I call it Jason’s Democracy. Here is what we do, we cancel all elections. No more voting. Instead we pick our “leaders” just like jury duty. You open the phone book, start calling people, and take what you get! If you don’t have a good excuse you have to be a “leader” - president, senator, congressman, etc - for a month.
No more campaigns, no lobbyists, no undue influence. Jason’s Democracy would work because we are a lot smarter and our politicians are a lot dumber then we think. Sure, with Jason’s Democracy you might end up with some perverts, schnooks, deadbeats, drunks, nincompoops, numb nuts, lame brains, bozo’s, crack heads and whores, but that is what we’ve got in there now and we can’t get rid of them. With my plan if you get an idiot for a leader, they’re done in a month and then you can call someone else.
This is a great plan - sure, a pharmacist who became, oh let’s say a Senator, for a month might vote to invade Canada because they have cheaper prescription drugs, or a pro-gun guy might want his own stock pile of arms to scare kids out of his yard - but most of the people in Congress will be sane and say, NO, and here’s the beautiful part - all leaders would have to go back home in a month and face their neighbors who have to live with the laws and tax cuts that produce the lousy schools and roads and whatever else they voted in. And that my friends, is when Jason’s Democracy get’s interesting!
Thanks for letting me vent for a moment, and now it is back to work for this government employee. Ha ha


Amie said...

Jason!!!! Thank you for FINALLY updating your blog. I was starting to wonder about you guys! Since Jason's Decomcracy hasn't been rolled out yet, I will happily vote for Barack Obama! =)

Nikki and Kevin said...

Sounds like an interesting theory. It's crazy enough that it just might work!

Thanks for all the updates. You guys have been busy.